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Quick
Nick-isms
Name: Nicholas Martin
Age: 19
Loc: Tucson, AZ
Occ: Student
Favs: Fall, Rock & Roll, Steve Martin,
X-mas, Driving, Jones Soda, Bowling, Adam Voith, Air Drums (see picture), The New Songs (My Songs)
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Dates
I
sing and play guitar and on occasion you can now
find me doing this in public. Here's the where and
and when:
Jan 25:
w/ Table For One and Burning Troy @ the Living
Room
Feb 9: w/ Burning Troy and a band TBA @
Modified
Arts
(Phoenix)
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I was a fool to trust the seasons again. I thought the weather was changing but it appears I've been deceived again. It seems that time and time again I fall victim to a hint of a cool breeze or a cloudy day and time and time again I wind up hurt. I need to stop trusting the weather or thinking it's changing. It's not and I can't continue crying over its lies.
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it up
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| 2:17 PM AZ
While I was in Flagstaff a couple weeks ago, I met the new girlfriend of one of my best friends. She was cute, intelligent, and better than anything for Chris. One evening, while about 8 of us were chatting in or near the doorway of her dorm room, the topic of discussion became a list hanging on her door which she and her roommate were in the ongoing process of compiling. The subject of the list? What we like about guys. The thing that stuck out at me (though I never brought it up, out of politeness) was that the word LOVE wasn't on the list at all. No mention about wanting love in a relationship seemed really odd to me, though I wasn't sure about the others.
I guess I don't see dating the same as everyone else does. I have no desire to find a casual, short term relationship at this point in my life. I know that there is something so much bigger out there and I can't settle for anything less. I'm sure it will be hard on future relationships simply because its always best to be friends first.
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| 10:56 PM AZ
To put it pointedly: we turned from the hell of summer heat to the heaven of fall crispness in less than 24 hours. Tucson.
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| 12:10 PM AZ
My post for November 12 seemed to hit the mark for some people (or so I was told). The IMs and conversations I had with friend about it spurred an interest in setting up some kind of comment log. I'm trying a free comment tool out for a while. I was going to create my own commenting page, but it got much to complicated and this serves its purpose. So go forth and write. As you may see for November 13, I've already messed up and posted the same thing twice. Trial and error, you know?
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| 11:59 AM AZ
I brought most conversations to a quick halt with many of the good friends that I saw today when I told them this very serious life revelation (I've been having so many of these lately, it's comforting): I've never (overall) been a very self confident person; not outgoing or sure of myself in most situations. In general, I am a little shy- at times awkward, but hardly ever the whimsical, outgoing Nick that is inside me. It was only today that I realized TWO things make this true, gregarious personality show itself to the world: The first I've known for quite a while--a year maybe--and that is a girl, the kind of girl that people use the word completes to describe. I found that a long term, steady (if you will) girlfriend can complete you or, make you show your true self in the real world. She can make you confident, strong...invincible at times. Literally, she makes you a whole person. That doesn't come around very often but is powerful when it happens.
The second thing that I've discovered has the same, yet somewhat diminished effect on my life is promoting these crazy shows. More for the self-enterprising factors than just being "a hobby," doing what I love and doing it on my own can give me the feeling that the world is mine. It doesn't have as powerful or long lasting an effect as a girl that you can give your utmost love to may have, but produces many of the same qualities. This wondrous understanding hit me late this afternoon while I was trying to get rid of nearly 4000 flyers and I've been walking on air ever since.
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| 11:48 PM AZ
It may be in arrogance that I say this but the issue was something on my mind last night: I may very well be too stable (at this point in my life) for most girls my age. It seems as though many of my good friends who are girls (whom I seek to maintain purely plutonic relationships with) go for moody guys; the kind of guys who torture them and make them hurt when they are not completely happy. This phenomenon was explained to my by my Humanities teacher who pointed out that we, as humans, all enjoy the feeling of pain. We take pleasure in melancholy (that joyous celebration of sadness). This is much too long to explain, but it makes sense when you really think about it. And I realize that even though I say I'm pretty stable, I still struggle with not losing myself in sadness. I've been trying hard not to slip into those ruts, but I do have blood running through my veins and that makes things hard.
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| 9:44 PM AZ
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Brandtson
Dial In Sounds
John Coltrane
Giant Steps
In The Country Of Last Things
by Paul Auster
Liars Academy
No News Is Good News
Various
Matt's XMas Gift
Fifteen Minutes Fast
the Demo
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